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I’ve got to say, Internet, I’m a little disappointed in my Urnesto the Eggplant-o merchandise sales. I’d think that, of the ten or so of you that read it, at least one of you would have bought a goofy band. But, it’s okay! I still love you. Love won’t pay back my bank loans, but we all make mistakes.

I got the bootleg Mexican VCD of [Urnesto Special Edition DVD] last year. Cost me 2 pairs of Levi’s and a Swatch.
-Sven

What? You’re stealing from me internet?! Wha… Wha… Why? I’ve always been faithful! You’re nothing but… But a DOWNRIGHT DIRTY PIRATE!!! Next thing I know you’ll be cheating on me with other websites. How can I ever trust you again?

Ohh… Don’t smile at me like that, you know it makes me melt. I forgive you.

Of course, I’d forgive you even more if you go ahead and buy into my next project. On September 1st, I give this humor thing a break, and put my fear mongering hat on. You’ll be so scared, you won’t be able to hold on to your wallets!

Do you guys need a countdown? I can do a countdown!

Links for YOU!